an ocean heart

Oh, those dreams where someone you haven’t thought of for a long time wanders in and invades your thoughts again. Oh, those mornings you wake up for once remembering the dream you just had and realize he was there and then realize you wake up thinking of him. Oh and when the first thought you have about them is that ‘I still have that book. Why doesn’t he want it back?’ you know that you’re over them and that no amount of dream-wandering and thought-invading could ever make you feel anything for them ever again. That’s a sweet feeling you have there, in that moment. A great morning upon you. Also, maybe I value books too much but I’m still waiting for him to want that book back. I don’t want to keep it. There are times when I am compelled to call him only to give that book back. But then, I’m afraid if I were to see them I would feel something again. There is a great difference in seeing people in dreams and seeing them before your eyes. You find poetry and beauty in every being and that, gift or curse I have not decided, is a dangerous place I want to keep myself far away from, for now.

(Oh and I'm sorry for not replying to comments much, of late. I just don't quite know what to say. Nevertheless, I am ever so grateful for every comment I get. But you know that, don't you?)